Wartime Brothers 1944

I went out yesterday, having managed to scrounge off early, to do a few odd bits of shopping. When I’d done that I went to the flicks and saw Monty Wooly and Gracie Fields (in a straight part). It was quite good although I can’t remember the title. Then I found myself something to eat and met a few of the boys in the local, but got cheesed (off) after a couple (N.B. Two ) drinks and found me a dance. I suppose it wasn’t a bad sort of dance, as dances go. But, nevertheless, Darling, the old zest was very definitely absent -replaced by an empty feeling that was even stronger than usual. So I was quite glad when I had to go to catch the train back.

Thank you very much for…for another grand letter. I should have answered it last night, but i was a …mean pig again and went to an ENSA show which wasn’t too bad and was quite a serious play. So at least it may have helped to improve my low brow status a little.

I don’t yet know how much time I shall have to write this, so if it stops rather abruptly, I hope you’ll forgive me, and I’ll promise to do my very best to write a decent letter this evening.

….I got quite a kick out of knowing that you had kept my letters, even those very first (and probably formal) ones. I did sometimes wonder if you still had them although I knew there was no real reason why you should. If you can keep a secret, I’ll confess that I still have all yours, starting off, I believe, with a postcard from Folkestone. And sometimes when I’m on leave, I enjoy getting them out and re-reading them yet again….

… You seem to be doing quite well for yourself with four whole days off at Easter. I don’t think I looked very envious when I read it... rathe annoyed that I couldn’t be with you during those four days. However I’m still keeping my fingers crossed very very tightly for the opportunity of picking up a telephone round about next Tuesday and endeavouring to persuade a certain North London exchange to give me a rather nice number…

I’ll try and write a decent letter soon, but there’s a mess dance (dance = brawl) tonight and I’ve got a feeling that letter writing won’t get much encouragement. I hope Pauline managed to get up for Easter, but don’t paint all the town red - I shall want a bit left…

There is also a somewhat aggravating piece of news - it seems that all our finger crossing is not working too well. With the result that we have today been told that our leave has been put back a week. We’ve all been binding away about it, and still are, but it doesn’t look very hopeful, so I thought that I’d let you know as soon as I could. I’m pretty cheesed (off) about it as you’ll guess.but it seems all we can do is keep those fingers crossed. for the next week or so…

Thank you for a grand letter … I must confess to a horribly brassed off feeling when I read those bits about our soon being together again, and thought that - far from being in a train nearing King’s Cross - I was instead sitting in the mess…at least I’ve still got that leave… to look forward [to].

…it was rather a queer coincidence that you should feel that we were close last Friday when you started that letter because I was a bit nearer than usual, in fact I went down to near Maidstone and stayed down there for an hour or so - and wished awful hard that I could be even nearer you.

This is just a note to go with the photograph and earrings which I have just packed up. Maybe you’ll recognise the corrugated cardboard!

Thank you too Darling for bolstering up the old morale a bit by telling me that your Mother and Father are very pleased about it. I’m glad they are, and don’t feel that you are letting the Hodkinson name down too badly! It’s rather funny in a way, I suppose, but I’ve always had a sort of horror of getting engaged, even until quite recently. but now that we are engaged and the idea has really sunk in, I must confess, Dearest, that it’s not a bad feeling at all, and really doesn’t make me feel so much older or more decrepit - as I’d always imagined it would.

By the way lass, what does that office of yours have to say now? I hope they realise the meaning of true love and no more cracks about R.B. 2s - even the R.A.F. generally has more decency than to say things like that.

I’ve just lit a cigarette with an old six penny lighter that lit our cigarettes quite a few times on this last leave - in Kew gardens, in the Strand Palace and, in fact, whenever we were together.

It’s Sunday afternoon now, and (i'm) comfortably, well fairly comfortably, ensconced in the chair at the Flight Office… drawing very unfavourable comparisons between [my] activities today and those of a week ago. Although … the sun is shining (after a fashion but never as nicely as when we are together).